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Melania Wearing Bullet Proof Vest To Parade, Stating “Are You Kidding Me, I’m Not Sitting Next To My Husband Out In The Open”

A subreddit for writing satirical news headlines in the style of *The Onion*

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Trump Learning A Lot About The Military Because He Never Went In When Called Upon.

A subreddit for writing satirical news headlines in the style of *The Onion*

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Kim Jong Un Unimpressed With US Military Parade, Says “Our Soldiers At Least March In Synchronicity”

A subreddit for writing satirical news headlines in the style of *The Onion*

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Army Tank Driver In Trump’s Birthday Parade, Sticking Out Of Turret Waving To the Crowd Like He Is The Rose Bowl Queen.

A subreddit for writing satirical news headlines in the style of *The Onion*

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As Trump Birthday Parade Narrator Described Vietnam War Equipment, Lip Reader Says Melania Asked Trump “Isn’t That The One You Dodged?”

A subreddit for writing satirical news headlines in the style of *The Onion*

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Army Cadet Marching Down The Capitol Wondering Where He Went Wrong In Life To Be In A Parade.

A subreddit for writing satirical news headlines in the style of *The Onion*

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Trump Parade Narrator Describing What A Jeep Is, Because, As Trump Says: “A Lot Of People Don’t Even Know What A Jeep Is, Until I Put It In My Parade, I’m Making The Word “Jeep”Popular Again”

A subreddit for writing satirical news headlines in the style of *The Onion*

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Gavin Newsom Furious Trump Wants To Rename LA’s Baseball Team “The Los Angeles Draft Dodgers”

A subreddit for writing satirical news headlines in the style of *The Onion*

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Trump Military Parade Speech: “Let Me Remind You All, If There’s A School Shooting, I Would Run Into The School Even Without A Gun”

A subreddit for writing satirical news headlines in the style of *The Onion*

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Trump “Not Too Concerned About Democratic Representatives Being Shot In Minnesota, Because They Were “For” Subsidising School Lunches”.

A subreddit for writing satirical news headlines in the style of *The Onion*

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Most Well Known Draft Dodger, Skips Out On His Own Military Birthday Party

A subreddit for writing satirical news headlines in the style of *The Onion*

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Trump Parade: After 11AM Performance Of “The Latin Music Ensemble”, ICE Moves In And Arrest The Band Members On Stage To “Show America’s Strength”

A subreddit for writing satirical news headlines in the style of *The Onion*

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Pete Hegseth Had To Be Pulled Out Of A Nearby Bar After 3 Bloody Marys, To Host The Opening Wreath-Laying Ceremony

A subreddit for writing satirical news headlines in the style of *The Onion*

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Trump Birthday Parade Fires Off 79 Abrams Tank Salute, Shells Rain Down On Surrounding Areas

A subreddit for writing satirical news headlines in the style of *The Onion*

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Trump Dissapointed Melania Did Not “Go Down On Him In A Theatre” Like He Heard On An Alanis Morissette Song.

A subreddit for writing satirical news headlines in the style of *The Onion*

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Trump Books A Tee Time For During The Military Parade, “I Am Not Sitting Through That Boring Parade”

A subreddit for writing satirical news headlines in the style of *The Onion*

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Aides Say Trump Expanded ICE Arrests To Include “Legal” Immigrants Hoping To Deport Melanie, “Who Hasn’t Been Giving Me Any Sex Since I Started Wearing My Orange War Paint”🧅

A subreddit for writing satirical news headlines in the style of *The Onion*

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Trump Says He Was Warned By Isreal Of Their Attack On Iran, Which Means He Wasn’t

A subreddit for writing satirical news headlines in the style of *The Onion*

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Breaking News On Military Parade: 6000 Army Soldiers To Sing “Happy Birthday” To Trump, As The President Will Blow Out 79 Candles On 79 Hamburgers Before Consuming All Of Them

A subreddit for writing satirical news headlines in the style of *The Onion*

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Breaking: Florida Governor Ron DeSantis Says It Is OK To Run Over Protesters If They Are Blocking Your Way

A subreddit for writing satirical news headlines in the style of *The Onion*

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Convicted Felon Who Ran For And Became President, Thinks Non-Felon California Governor, Committed Crime By “Running For Governor”

A subreddit for writing satirical news headlines in the style of *The Onion*

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MAGA Upset That Democrats Are Stealing A Page From The Right Wing News Conspiracy Playbook, By Claiming That “Republican Paid Actors” Are Inciting The Los Angeles Protests.

A subreddit for writing satirical news headlines in the style of *The Onion*

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Republicans Caught Hiring Mexicans To Riot In LA

A subreddit for writing satirical news headlines in the style of *The Onion*